Meet The Cats

We have two of these. They are dearly loved, and much on my mind of late, as we are in the process of figuring out how to move them from Australia to Scotland with the minimal amount of fuss. So, here they are.

Name: Quill, aka Quilleth, Quilliam, Quilderbeast, Quillfish, Quoo, Owlcat, Fish, Emopard, Panther, Sook, Pest, Large Cat, Bigness, Bigbeast and Pineapple.

Current Age: Sixish.

Rescued From: A creepy albino stoner living in Newtown, and also a warehouse full of crazy recreational stoners who had his stillborn sister encased in resin to use as a paperweight.

Likes: Sleeping, eating, sunbeams, tall places, uncomfortable nests in improbable locations, slinking, aluminium foil, hugs, grooming, licking the ears of the Small Cat, and watermelon.

Dislikes: Sudden loud noises, car trips, going in a cage for any reason, being Off The Map, and rain.

Special Skills: Strategic immobility, forming a hemisphere that slowly expands into whichever region of the bed you happen to vacate, stretching to extraordinary lengths without actual dislocation, picking fights with dogs, knocking things over, clumsiness, playing fetch, and singing to rats.

Name: Indi, aka Indipard, Tinypard, Daintypard, Smoo, Duchess, Littleness, Midget, Smidget, Mooj, Bunnet, Munnet, Small Cat and Tinylion.

Current Age: Fiveish.

Rescued From: A knee-deep patch of ivy between three adjoining fences in the middle of a storm.

Likes: Tall places, evading insolent humans, colonising sedentary humans, food that goes crunch, sunbeams, glaring, sharpening her claws, destroying the Large Cat, and mice.

Dislikes: The vacuum cleaner, birds, unfamiliar humans who don’t sit still, being thwarted, being hugged, using the litterbox at night, being kicked off the end of the bed, and dogs.

Special Skills: Eating an entire dove in one go, vermicide, precision bopping, an extremely loud purr, velcronic claws, the ability to furl into a perfect circle, riding on shoulders, getting out of a completely sealed house while leaving no visible exit point, and base cunning.

They really are very sweet beasts.